Jasmine is loved by many

It's always a good weekend when I get to see my dad. We prepared for rain but after a picnic lunch the clouds began to separate and soon it was full, blissful sunshine. We had a chance to walk along the American River Canyon while J slept. After waking, she felt like she was really missing out on the fun and in fact, she was. "Mama, out, out" was her plea and when we were close enough to the car, out it was. She latched onto her Nagypapa's hand and easily bounced and hopped and skipped her way back.
Today we lucked out again when our friend Steph agreed to hang out with J while we joined her husband on a bike ride. Not only did she take J to the playground, gave her a nap and baked cookies with her, she also fed us a delicious home-cooked meal upon our arrival home.

Are Jasmine's affections any more obvious than this picture?

Joining the club

What's the best thing that I've done for myself this year? Granted, the year is young, but it's always nice to start off on the right foot. So after months of deliberating, I had a come-to-Jesus moment with myself and said...it's time. I joined a new gym. With daycare. For those of you who know me, or if you've been following this blog for awhile, you know that I love to exercise. It's in my DNA. I'm not a ball-player or into team sports, I just like to run. And ride my bike. And do yoga. And work-out. And I like to do it a lot. When I can't find the time to fit it in, I get a little bit cranky. Those who are close to me have come to adapt and I try to maintain some perspective when life gets in the way. But, bottom line is, I'm just a lot more pleasant to be around when I've gotten the endorphins flowing for awhile.

When you become a mother for the first time on the cusp of your 43rd birthday, you've also been used to doing things a certain way for a long time. I've made a lot of necessary adjustments to my life in the last year and a half, especially when it comes to things like long bike rides first thing in the morning.

But I do like a good sweat. And lately, running up and down very steep hills with a 32 pound child in her chariot is putting a real strain on the old hip joints. I needed some new options. And I couldn't be happier. Jasmine loves to go to the gym, the babysitting center is flawless, the spin classes are fun and the remodeled women's locker room supplies towels AND blowdryers. There's an outdoor pool, hot tub and sauna, none of which I've tried yet. I'm pretty darned pleased. I won't be reporting about any 15 mile runs for awhile, but I'm good with that.

It's not exactly lying...

It's about credibility. Now that Jasmine is an avid communicator, we routinely have conversations with her that involve her feedback. For example, Jasmine is in school 2 days a week. Mama drops her off and Baba picks her up. This creates a situation where the only way we know what happened at school today is if she tells us. So in typical parent-fashion, we begin the process of inquiring about her day--and yes, I know this will go on long into adolescence, trying to find out about my daughter's life away from home.

Jasmine, did you have a good day at school?

Yah.

Who did you play with ?

Max. (it's always Max, whether he's there or not)

Did you play with anyone else?

Emmy.

Emmy? or Abby? or Emily? or Amy? Which one?

Emmy.

Emmy? Your special friend, Emmy?

Yah.

Ok, so when Emmy's mom called tonight to set up a playdate, it turns out that their entire family has been out of town for a week. No Emmy at school, for the whole week. Now this happens routinely with all kinds of things, from what she ate for lunch to whether or not she earned her m and m's during the day. We've figured out, finally, that in order to get the truth, we must rely on each other to verify the accuracy of what we're being told.

And I imagine, in my professional opinion, that the story-telling will get more elaborate as the years go on and we will just get a little more savvy.

Discovery museum, San Jose style

Jasmine and I jetted down to my mom's house for a weekend visit and we made a dash over to the Discovery Museum before it closed on Sunday. With tickets at half-price, we certainly got our money's worth in less than an hour. Jasmine, not knowing what a museum is, was very excited to go and kept saying "museum, museum" until we arrived.
The museum is the epitome of the Bay area--chic, contemporary, multicultural and family-oriented. After all, it is painted lavender and has an enormous rubber ducky on the roof.

A little tentative at first, J started to warm up and find her rhythm.
Climbing.
Jumping and throwing balls.
Physics.
Sand, measuring, pouring.
Serving pizza, offering more cheese.
And when it was all over, a final pose on the outdoor steps. All that in less than an hour? We will certainly be making another trip to the San Jose Discovery Museum.

"Be happy"

Ready for school. Two days a week, the backpack comes and gets packed with a lunch and Jasmine is excitedly out the door.

Jasmine is full of Jasminisms these days, those little 2-3 word phrases that quickly become part of our everyday vernacular. Most recently, be happy is the phrase du jour and she really means it. She loves to be happy and insists that we share in her joy. When I'm really NOT happy about something, I don't need to yell. I just say "Mama is not happy". This immediately gets her attention and she says:

Mama, be happy.

This is a pretty effective process for both of us since I get to tell her how she can make Mama happy and she can attempt to achieve it. By effective, I mean it's working around our house this particular week.

On a very different note, a world disaster has struck and now is the time to take action. Please donate right away to your favorite international relief charity and remember how extraordinarily lucky we are in our lives. The people of Haiti need our support and resources and we must all act NOW to help save lives.

M and M

I didn't think I would do it, or need to do it. But after spending time Christmas eve with Jasmine's new friend, Emmy, I decided it was time. Emmy's family came to our house for some holiday cheer and even though little Emmy is one month younger than J, she is totally potty-trained. I admit, I felt envy. J has been using her potty for months and months now, but there seemed to be no progress towards any significant shift in her thinking about it. It was just kind of fun, a novelty, joining Mama in an activity. But when Emmy was here, they went potty together every single time. All night long. Emmy's mom spent more time in the bathroom with the 2 girls than anywhere else.

So I asked a few probing questions and learned about the simple trick--m and m's. I know, all you seasoned parents out there might be laughing at me, but some things don't always come easy. I'm not struggling with discipline, or routine, or even guilt. I accept that we all have busy lives and J can't be with me 24/7. But rewarding her with candy for going to the potty?

Yes. Why? Because it's starting to work. And I don't exactly like spending a fortune on diapers, or contributing to the landfill since you will not find me washing diapers at home. The progress is slow but it's there. This weekend, we spent a few hours in the house wearing big girl panties and for the first time ever, after an initial accident, she felt the urge, the trickle and then looked at me and said peepee. She held it and held it until I could get her to the potty and...SUCCESS. Over and over. Last night, she earned 2 m and m's in one sitting. Enough said.

"I ready!"

This is the new, oft-heard expression in our home these days. You might think that it applies to wanting to go to school, or having obediently washed ones hands before dinner, or perhaps putting ones shoes on to go to the playground. Well, my friends, those are all good guesses but it has nothing to do with any of these things. It has to do with time-outs. Our sweet little Jasmine? Needing time-outs? I chuckle just writing the words. Because despite the praise and flattery I bestow upon her for much of this blog, Jasmine is truly a piece of work. I mean that in the most loving possible way. Jasmine is developing language skills at an astonishing rate but somehow NO has taken on new and heightened meaning.

As in, "Jasmine, please come sit down for dinner." NO

Jasmine, please pick up your toys. NO

It's time for your bath. NO

You get the idea. So we try to be polite. Jasmine, I'm asking you one more time to put your puzzle away. Don't walk away from me right now or you will have to take a time-out until you're ready to put your puzzle away. What do you want to do, put your puzzle away or take a time-out?

"TIme-out."

Yes, that's her choice, multiple times a day. She goes to her room and asks for the light to be turned out (Light, please), sits down in the same self-designated spot and 45 seconds later bursts from her room shouting "I ready, I ready!" You're ready to _____________?

Yes, I ready.

And she proceeds to complete whatever we asked of her. It's everything we can do to keep a straight face, but at the same time, is she really supposed to be enjoying her time-outs? Did we miss something in our Parenting for Idiots handbook? Because lately, we're feeling a little bit duped by the whole process. Don't get me wrong. We're not wanting her to suffer (too much). But maybe a little contrition would be nice...after all, we would like to feel some sense of effectiveness as parents to our take-no-prisoners 2 year old.

Our babysitter is a rock star!

Actually, she's a climbing star in real life. She has been competing for the last couple of years at local and national rock-climbing competitions and is quickly rising through the ranks. She even snatched up a sponsorship deal this year. Did I mention that she's only 12 years old? And certified in baby CPR? She definitely rocks.
Her Christmas present is this cool device called a static line. Secured between 2 trees, she can walk the rope barefoot. Apparently while mom and dad were out on a run, Jasmine was learning how to walk a tightrope, without any fear.
What better way to treat oneself after a busy day of playing than to make a batch of cookies...and lick the beaters, of course.
Thanks to Hannah's mom, we got a snapshot of how much fun J has when left with Hannah for 4 hours. And why J falls asleep minutes after being placed in her carseat.

Shane and I had the chance, for the second weekend in a row, to do a 15 mile run out on the glorious trails and canyons of the American River. I guess we're finally getting the hang of this parenting thing, trying to achieve balance, trying to carve out time to be together and do the things we love. I DO NOT KNOW how parents do it with more than 1 kiddo.

Next stop? A night out? A movie?

Holiday in review

The holidays were a success for us this year and I'm very grateful for that. Last year was very difficult for a number of reasons and I couldn't wait to get the Christmas tree down and out of the house! We were just learning last year about Jasmine's pulmonary sling and the subsequent months leading to her (thankfully) cancelled surgery in June were tough for our family. We had a lot to celebrate and reflect on as 2009 came to a close. We're happy to see the back end of this past year.

Without further ado, the holiday season started off with a visit with my friend Joyce. Jasmine is happy to converse with and entertain anyone who is special to me (or any stranger off the street, at times).

We stumbled upon a friendly cat, and Jasmine is quite partial to cats. She was confused when this one started biting and grabbing at her arm a little later. There's a lot to learn about cats--it's not always soft fur and purrs.
Jasmine can pretty much entertain herself with anything, even outdoor plumbing.
We headed up to Tahoe to be with the nieces for a couple of days. I didn't take nearly enough pictures of all of their cuteness but you get the general idea. There was a lot of outdoor time, sledding, digging and caving.
Shane dug out a cave for Gwennie and soon Jasmine got in on the fun.
Even Zami got a shot at the luxury of the cave.

Isn't this pink snowsuit the coolest? Jasmine is modeling yet another hand-me-down from her cousins. If it weren't for Aunt Kiki saving all the outgrown clothes we would be struggling to keep this kid clothed. She is growing so fast that our garage is overflowing with bags of yesterday's stuff. I honestly can barely keep up.